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"I don't have enough middle fingers to communicate my feelings to you." --clover kicker

"New from SCO: FiascOS - The Operating System for all the family."--codemonkey uk

"If you do not sin, then you too may some day float like a big pink Goodyear blimp of The Lord." -theboz

"It is virtually impossible to effectively aim a jellyfish, a creature created by God almost solely for the purpose of not flying." - Christopher Robin Was Murdered

"Too bad no one makes some sort of Febreeze for Beards."--MNS

Maybe you can set up a RAID array of toasters - actually I guess that would be a RAIT array (Redundant Array of Inexpensive Toasters) - for when you simply must have a successful batch of toast. - orangepeel on Slashdot

"...it isn't like I dug up her great-grandmother and fucked her in the eye socket." -clock

I am the promise of violence and the reality of nothing.

"I rub my hands together, generating the frictive heat I will need to avoid causing my equipment to turtle when I move in to aim." -CheeseBurgerBrown

"I love my brain. It's the only organ I can afford to lose."  --frijolito

"If that's not irony, I'll drink a kitten." --Fleece

"Well, one of the two girls I'm friendly with out here is a Christian and she wouldn't do the things I want to do." --Sapphire

"...I almost puked like a pregnant StackyMcRacky."  --MillMan

"I have a high threshold for taking it in the bum..." - MissTrish